Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
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