There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize