R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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