When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
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