Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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