when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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