Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
i was born a porn star she said
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I'm like, not good at living.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize