hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize