Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize