I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
You can't just leave with hair like that
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
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