it wasn't lemon gatorade
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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