Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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