I wish I only lived at night.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
it glows. i had to have it.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize