my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
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I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
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Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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