she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
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