so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Randomize