dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
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sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
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I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
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