Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
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