Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
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