I wish you could order shots online.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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