Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize