my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
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