dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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