i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
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