Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize