i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize