oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize