I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize