walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
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I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
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Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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