a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
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Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
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So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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