well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Randomize