So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
Randomize