when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize