dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
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