i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
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Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
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im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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