and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alive.
So much puke
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Randomize