My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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