Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
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