I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
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You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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