I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Randomize