dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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