Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
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