Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize