when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
she looked like the before picture.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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