So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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