:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
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He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
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If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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