definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
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