I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize