Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize