We're like a lot better than the average bears
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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